Jai al-Leno, the Taliban's "Minister of Monologue":

"So the Devil in Chief George W. Bush asked every American child to donate a dollar to help the suffering children of Afghanistan. [audience: "awwwww"] Yep, and around the same time, Mullah Mohammed Omar asked every Afghan child to begin preparation for a lifetime of holy war in which he hopes they will be martyred after leading thousands of Western infidels to their fiery deaths. [clapping] Because, you know, jihad is really about the kids."

Heeeere's Jai.